Sunday, May 14, 2006

Email: Man's vs. woman's needs [--]

Here is my take on how it usually works between men and women (from my steady experience anyway):

The man says he is going to spend a given afternoon, entire day, entire week, or whatever, doing X. He says this consistently over a given span of time, and he says he will be unavailable for chitchat or emotional support during that time.

The woman asks for and pursues his attention for chitchat and emotional support during that time. She intimates that if he cared at all or loved her, he can make the time to do this for her. So his deadlines (upon which his career, reputation, and earning power depend) slip or fail. He promises those to whom he must answer that he will get in (say) eight hours on a given day, but he actually only gets in six, or four, or two hours, because she demands that much attention. It galls him, because he has been clear about his needs, but he says nothing, because he loves her and she would take it personally (not as a man would take it). Such things a man does for love--but wishes it were not always about her needs but sometimes (when necessary) about his.


Post a Comment

<< Home