Musings: Entitlement vs. self-esteem

I speak with a lot of people, and everyone I've met (including myself) has some issues in some way with self-esteem (some more than others).

Entitlement seems to me a better term than self-esteem, even though the two mean the same thing. Entitlement implies feeling one is not entitled to the same considerations as everyone else and is therefore "less than" others; self-esteem seems to denote this phenomenon working in the opposite direction (feeling "less than" and therefore not worth the trouble usually accorded to others).

For example, introductions and small talk are sometimes hard for me because I don't feel "entitled" in the same way that more gregarious people do; or maybe it just goes back to fears of childhood ridicule and rejection. Yet we are all entitled to pursue happiness and enjoy it where we find it; and anyone who tells or tries to convince any person otherwise is untrusting or misguided. (You may tell me that a certain action or decision is not in your interest, or mine; but trying to persuade another that enjoying friends or laughter is selfish or immoral is itself selfish and immoral.)

The answer is never so much a huffy self-emphasis that says "I deserve this" but a calm inner confidence that assumes and exudes equality and says "I'm worthwhile." True friends will back you up on this.