Email: One year on eharmony [EH]

Please don't make the online dating arena into a rejection derby. It's like interviewing for a job: It's about finding the best match not I-must-win-each-time-or-I'm-toast. This is serious stuff and it does not and should not happen quickly or casually [much less in one year]. By the way, I [used to] get more dates (I am kidding here OK?) by *not* mentioning my hunchback *before* she says "Yes, coffee sounds nice." You have to understand that men think they can have the whole enchilada -- beauty and brains, allure and practicality. It takes them a number of years before they come to grips about reality (if ever). I repeat: You don't want a shallow man in shallow waters. So women in general have to wait until men are ready to start treading water, much less swimming for their lives. (Men thrive at facing challenges, but only in things they are good at, so many shy away from nonbusiness-related social interaction esp. the deeper, bonding stuff that's emotionally and personally authentic.)